🎭 ELECTION SEASON SURVIVAL GEAR 🎭
Presidential Masks | Political Satire Tees | Hilarious Gifts
⚡ Fast Shipping | 💯 Quality Materials | 😂 Equal Opportunity Mockery
alloween party? Campaign rally satire? Awkward Thanksgiving dinner icebreaker?
We've got the masks, merch, and mayhem you need.
🎭
PREMIUM MASKS
High-quality latex & rubber masks. Trump, Biden, Kamala, Elon, and more. Realistic enough to confuse your neighbors.
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SATIRE APPAREL
T-shirts, hoodies, and accessories that take jabs at both sides. Wear your political humor proudly (or ironically).
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PERFECT GIFTS
That one friend who won't shut up about politics? Get them a mask. Problem solved. You're welcome.
SHOP BY FACTION
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RED FACTION
Republican Masks & Merch
Trump, DeSantis, Reagan, Nixon, Cruz, and the whole GOP crew. Make America Laugh Again.
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BLUE FACTION
Democrat Masks & Merch
Biden, Kamala, Bernie, Obama, and the donkey party legends. Blue wave? More like blue comedy.
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PURPLE FACTION
Billionaire & Media Masks
Elon Musk, Zuckerberg, Bezos. The people who ACTUALLY run things. Oligarch chic is in.
🎃 HALLOWEEN READY | 🎉 PARTY PERFECT | 🎁 GIFT-WORTHY
All masks are one-size-fits-most adults. Fast shipping. Quality materials. Satisfaction guaranteed or your Thoughts & Prayers back.
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Spooky Election Season Fun
Get ready for a howling good time as we dive into the thrills and chills of election season with a humorous twist
🎉 PERFECT FOR EVERY OCCASION
🎃 Halloween Parties
Scariest costume at the party? A politician. Runner-up? Also a politician.
🗳️ Election Watch Parties
CNN or Fox News? Doesn't matter when everyone's wearing masks.
🦃 Thanksgiving Dinner
Uncle won't stop talking politics? Put a mask on him. Problem solved.
🎁 Gag Gifts
Secret Santa? White Elephant? Political masks are the ultimate chaos gift.
📸 Content Creation
TikTok, Instagram, YouTube. Sora videos. Political satire content gold.
🎭 Protest Accessories
Rally satire. Campaign parody. Free speech? Free masks? Why not both.
Pro Tip: Buy masks for BOTH factions. Stay neutral. Mock everyone. Maximum comedy.
📬 JOIN THE CAPITOL CREEPS COMMUNITY
We're building something bigger than just masks.
Capitol Creeps TCG (Trading Card Game) is coming soon.
🃏 WHAT'S COMING?
⚔️ 164-card political satire TCG (South Park meets Yu-Gi-Oh)
🎮 Power vs Charisma dual-attack system
🎭 5 factions: Red, Black, Blue, Green, Purple/Orange/Algorithm
💀 Equal opportunity mockery - no politician is safe
📧 NEWSLETTER COMING SOON 📧
Get early access to:
Card reveals | Limited edition masks | TCG launch updates | Exclusive deals
(Follow us on social - links coming soon!)
For now, grab the masks and merch. Support the chaos. Cards drop when democracy finally collapses. So... any day now.
🔥 TRENDING NOW 🔥
Top Picks for Election Season:
Trump masks flying off shelves | Kamala masks perfect for debates | E.T. Alien masks (for that "politician from another planet" vibe)
⬇️ Check out our featured deals below ⬇️
💬 WHAT CUSTOMERS ARE SAYING
"Wore the Trump mask to my office Halloween party. My boss (a Democrat) lost it laughing. 10/10 would recommend for bipartisan chaos."
- Sarah M., Denver, CO ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"Got the Kamala mask for my sister who won't shut up about politics. She wore it to Thanksgiving. Family drama averted. You saved Christmas."
- Jake P., Austin, TX ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"The Elon Musk mask is PERFECT. Wore it to a tech conference. Someone asked me about Dogecoin. I just pointed at the sky and walked away."
- Anonymous Billionaire, Silicon Valley ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"Quality is legit. Material feels durable. Latex is thick. My Kim Jong Un mask survived a full night of drunk friends trying to impeach me. Worth every penny."
- Mike R., Chicago, IL ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
😂 LAUGH THERAPY | 🎭 INSTANT CONVERSATION STARTER | 💯 QUALITY GUARANTEED
⚠️ WARNING: POLITICAL SATIRE ZONE ⚠️
Choose Your Faction: 🔴 RED DECK 🔵 BLUE DECK 💰 BILLIONAIRE CARDS
Equal Opportunity Mockery Coming Soon | It's Over 9,000 Thoughts & Prayers!